30 Day Challenge

We arrived home on Sunday night/Monday morning at 4 a.m. I got the kids in bed and did my best to fall asleep quickly since I had to get up at 7:30 to start watching kids. My darling husband drove the whole day/night so he slept most of Monday. I kept thinking I needed to get this post on here yesterday but never found the time or energy to do so.

My goals for this past week were to listen to my husband more intently and to get the sarcasm out of my voice. I did pretty well on those points, but not perfect. We were on vacation so we were more relaxed than we are at home with all the things going on here. I did make it a point to keep my mouth closed as he was talking to me or our friends. I found out a lot of things that way, imagine! I have a tendency to talk so much and if I am not careful I take up all the conversation. And I am with little children, mostly infants, all day so I am starved for that conversation. I found out some great insights from doing that. Amazing how that happens. Also, I am sure that he felt better because I was listening and made it a point to let him know that what he said was important enough for me to listen to. The sarcasm has been a little hard. Not because I wanted to be ugly, just because it is habit. We mostly do it to be "funny". I did a little better.

My goals for this week now that we are back home are more back to the original. I want to meet him at the door and walk him to the door when he leaves for work. I need to take a lesson from my kids. They run to their dad if he is coming or going. They did that last night and he started to "act" impatient but I grinned at him and told him he loved it and he knew it. His return grin told me I was right.

I want to make a huge effort to have a home cooked meal on the table for him each night when he gets up (he works the night shift) and a home cooked meal when he gets home in the mornings. That is a huge chore for me because I am so tired at the end of the day. The last thing I want to do is cook a hot meal that will steam up my Texas kitchen! It is hot enough already. And in the mornings it is busy when he gets home because children have already arrived. But it is usually easier in the mornings.

Also, I have fallen down on the job of laundry. I have it clean (except what I brought back from vacation) but I do not have it put up. I have all of his clothes folded in a basket for HIM to put up. And even though at times I feel justified in doing that, when I really think about how hard he works and how hard a night schedule is on a person I know that it isn't right for me to do that. I need to make his time at home as easy as possible where he can spend time with his kids and me and not feel like so much is there for him to do. He is already my Mr. Fixit. There is always something that needs fixing. Like today before he went to bed he had to fix our air conditioner because it wasn't draining properly and it was going into the carpet in the hall. So with things like that coming up, he really doesn't need to have to worry about trying to find his clothes before work. I feel terrible because of it. But some days, I just don't have it in me to do anything about it. You would think that after my vacation I would have more energy to get things done. Maybe I will after a weekend to catch up on the laundry, cleaning and paying bills. 

Until next time...blessings to you. 

Marriage 30 Day Challenge

I know it isn't Monday, we were actually camping in Colorado on Monday so my computer was not turned on! Challenges this last week? You bet there were. With me being stressed out because of our trip coming up and so many things on my to do list, it was making me nuts! I hate feeling like that. I tell myself over and over to stay calm and it is fine. But the devil really knows how to push our buttons, as I have said before.

I really wanted to make some major leaps and bounds on this challenge this week but don't think I did very well. He was tired and stressed out as well so we made a fine pair! Nick has been going through a low period and that always makes our relationship a little strained. It is so much pressure to try to counter his moods to help him turn them around into something good not bad. 

I am trying very hard to show him respect in front of the kids. I am trying to see his ideas and suggestions on things in a new light. I am a person who generally thinks she is right. I know, most people aren't like that, are they. But I am! I am trying to not be so matter of fact about everything. And when he doesn't understand what I am trying to tell him, like with directions to someplace we are trying to get to, I am doing my best to stay calm and let him know that I am trying my best, in a very nice, respectful manner. That is a hard thing for me because we have spent so many years being sarcastic to one another, most of the time kidding but it has really gone too far. I want to be the wife I am supposed to be and support him and make him feel good.  I don't think my sarcasm does that.

Another goal this week is to spend time listening to him talk, about whatever he wants to talk about, be it his music, Westcliffe, work, whatever. And really listening, not just half way. That tends to get a little hard with 3 children wanting your attention for something. But I am praying that God will give me the time to do just that. We have 4 more full days of our vacation plus one day of driving. I want to spend some real time making my husband feel loved and appreciated.

Until next time...blessings to you. 

Saturday Sunset In Westcliffe, Colorado

I just wanted to share a beautiful sunset that we saw when we were here last March. This happened to be a Saturday night. It was so beautiful! We are in Westcliffe right now but will head to a camp ground in Leadville tomorrow after church. We went to the little Baptist church when we were here then and it was small but nice.

I am so excited to be on vacation. We didn't get to leave the house until about 11, instead of 9. The toilet backed up, one of the day care kids forgot to flush after using too much paper. Then another child went in and added more to it. So.....that was fun....NOT! But we had to clean it up before we left. I drove until we got to Amarillo at 5 a.m. and then John took over. Bless him! I was so beat! I slept until we got to the border of Colorado and ate breakfast at Denny's. We have been up since then. Everyone is asleep but me. I got in the shower after everyone was asleep. I am beat so I am going to go to bed so I can get up for church tomorrow. I will have work to do on my hair!!! So I need to get up early!

Until next time...blessings to you.

Spiritual Warfare

Just when you start to grow, Satan begins his attack. When you are ready to grow in your relationship with the Lord and/or the relationships that the Lord says are important to maintain, he starts throwing things at you to get you off track. We each have a choice to make at that point...let him stop you in your tracks or... tell him to leave you alone and put your focus back where it was before. How do I know this? Because I have lived it many times and am living it now.   As a lot of you know, there is a 30 Day Challenge to Honor You Husbands that I am a part of. I am trying to stay focused on that challenge and Satan is throwing all sorts of things my way. I have not slept well for the last few days. I think I am feeling the pressure of our trip coming up so soon and not having anything ready yet. Nick, who has been doing so good for so long had a small but bad meltdown yesterday. That really made me feel depressed for most of today. Satan has done a job on me in that area for many years and he knew that would bring me down faster than anything else would. He was right. It tore me down. The meltdown wasn't very big and didn't last very long but it made me feel as if the whole world had come down on top of me. The weight was enormous. I have tried to push those feelings away all day but some kept lingering. I think I had to have the chance to get on here and put my feelings down so that I could let it go and move on. My day has been so busy with kids that I have not had a chance to do this.

So now that the kids are in bed and all the daycare kids are gone, I can sit down and spend some quiet time praying and reading encouraging words to build me back up to where God wants me to be. I have spent so many years, yes years, letting his meltdowns bring me down. I could be postitive about anything else and look at the bright side of things. But not that. I just couldn't see past the pain I felt. For years I have heard and believed, except for this situation, that "God doesn't give you more than you and He can handle together". I felt like it was a lie in this situation. I would shout to Him that I couldn't take anymore. That He was wrong if He thought I could handle it. The problem was that I was trying to handle it on my own. I kept taking it back and trying, like most moms, to "fix things". But I can't fix this. I can only give it to the Lord and leave it in His hands and be comforted in knowing that He does want the best for His children and does not want us to suffer for nothing.

I know these things and have for many years. But sometimes we have to be reminded of what we know. God is growing me in this and someday I know I will be able to offer some kind of support for someone else that has had to go through things like it. If I come away from all this learning nothing then it was for naught. I do not want that. Of course, no mother wants her children to suffer for any reason. I am no exception to that. I have watched my son suffer for many years now and feel the pain because of it.

I am looking forward to seeing him happy more than sad for a change. He has actually been pretty happy the last few weeks. I pray that returns for our vacation so we can build some good and happy memories for all of us.

Until next time...blessings to you. 

An Almost "Midnight" Trip To Sonic

I was sitting here watching a movie with Jenni. JC had just gotten home from his friends house around the corner. His dad had picked him up before he left for work (He works nights). I got a thought out of the blue. "Wanna go get a chocolate shake?" A resounding "YES!" was heard throughout the house.

Why not? I can run to Sonic for a late night snack at 10 p.m. to spoil myself and my kids ever once in awhile, can't I? Sure I can. Normally, I am too tired at the end of the day to do anything but fall into bed. I don't know why I have a little more energy tonight than normal. It might be because I have been contemplating godly things all day and seeking His will in many things as I have gone through my day. I have drawn strength and wisdom from other godly women on their blogs.

So why did I go to Sonic at 10 at night? Part of it was because I really wanted a chocolate shake. And part of it was because it is summer, my kids don't have to go to school and they can sleep late in the morning if they want to. But not too late. During the summer we go to the free movies on Tuesdays. So we will go see Curious George in the morning and have a good laugh at the movies for free. I am trying to do lots of fun things with the kids during the summer so that we can build some fun memories of their childhood summers. I am big on memories! I sure wish I could find more time so I could scrapbook. I really love to capture my memories that way. Someday....

Night!

Until next time...blessings to you. 

Finally Friday

  Thank You, Lord, for Friday's. It has been a LONG week. Not a bad week, but long. The weekend was a busy one, remember it was Father's Day. Sunday started out with Donuts with Dad before Sunday School. After Sunday School, like any other Sunday morning, we headed to the apartment complex to teach Bible Study to the kids that come to hear about Jesus. Afterwards we met our oldest at Cracker Barrel to celebrate Father's Day with all four of our children. It was a great lunch but we had little time to sit and enjoy it. Sami had to get to work and the two younger kids had a birthday party to attend at 2:30. After the party the first day of our Vacation Bible School started. 

It was a wonderful week at Vacation Bible School, VBS. I was helping out in the 4's class and we had 7 regular kids each night. There were two nights that we had only 5 but it wasn't like most years were we just kept adding kids each night. We really had a great group of kids and they were great at remembering all they had learned each night. My kids had a great time in their classes. Game Champ was a helper in the 3rd grade class. He really enjoyed that. Each evening after all my daycare children left we would rush up to the church so we could get there by 6:15 and we didn't arrive home until 9:30. John had to leave for work each night by 9:40 so we didn't get to see him very much. VBS ran from Sunday through Thursday night.

Now, just because I had to work VBS all week didn't mean I got the week off from my daycare. On the contrary, during the summer I have extra kids, summer school age kids. On Tuesday mornings I take them to see a free movie. I take only the older children, no one under 2. The children are very well behaved on our outings. But the noise level can rise in the playroom when all the children are awake and playing the many different things they get into each day. By the end of the day, I was beat. I seemed to have a hard time sleeping, or I should say resting this week. I had a lot on my mind with our vacation coming up and trying to plan that as well as deal with all the daycare stuff that comes at me each day.

After reading the 30 day challenge my mind has been focused on some other things. More important things. My focus has been on my marriage and my husband. I went out to the shelves of books and got my copy of "The Praying Wife" and started reading the introduction. I know how great prayer can be. So as this week comes to a close and our short weekend comes and goes more quickly than I care to think about; I am going to do what I can so that this weekend and the following weeks don't drag me back to thinking about earthly things. I am excited to see what God is going to do with our relationship. We have been through so much together. We have been closer than we are now but only because of time spent together where we get hardly any now. But I plan trips together so we can have that time together or we would not see each other at all. I make us take time off. He appreciates it and I am glad. Next Friday night we will be on our way to Colorado for a week. We are so excited and I am going to use the time to study more and spend time with the Lord to grow.

I hope you have enjoyed looking at some pictures from VBS. It was a blessing and I can't wait to help again next year! Even in the mist of all the things I have had to do this week, I have enjoyed the blessings I have received and been a part of giving to the children this week.

Until next time...blessings to you.

Memories Monday - # 2 - Fathers - Part 1

When I think of "fathers" not just one person comes to my mind or one quality. I didn't grow up in a traditional home, per say, so that is off a bit. I never think about my birth father because he never had a part in my life. I think of my grandfather/adopted dad, my husband and my Heavenly Abba Father.

I was adopted by my maternal grandparents so my grandpa became my father in every other sense of the word "father". He was a quiet man who loved to work on cars, play golf, go deer hunting, play Domino's (Moon and/or 42) and watch "Gunsmoke" on TV while he napped in the chair. My grandmother sang in the church choir so on Sunday mornings before I turned into a teenager and sat with my friends because I was "too cool to sit with a parent" you would find me right next to my grandfather on the fourth pew from the front. On Friday mornings my grandmother would play a round of golf with her friends and he would take me to Burger Chef for a fish sandwich before heading to the golf course for his turn to play with his golfing buddies. When I was really little, about 5 or 6, I can remember his cleaning a deer in the garage. It was a dirt floor garage; we lived out near the fair grounds. I used to watch him and have long talks with him while he was working in there. I don't really remember about what but I can remember enjoying just hanging out where ever he was. He was the one that walked me down the isle when I got married. That was over 24 years ago and he went to be with the Lord in 1992, 8 1/2 months before my son Nick was born. He was a great father and a great man with many talents. He did not get the chance to know any of my children because he had a stroke when my oldest child was very little. I miss him very much and wish he could have known them. I know that he would have enjoyed my boys and my girls would have had him wrapped around their little fingers. June 19 was his birthday! Happy Birthday, Grandpa!

Parts two and three to come.

Until next time...blessings to you.